TheCalmDev (Dev J Haldar)

ravings, rantings and ramblings

So This Is How It Feels

I have always taken pride in my non-stereotypical marriage. I wanted it this way since I was in school. I was nurturing concepts of ‘equal partnerships’ and ‘independent dependency’ while writing displacement reactions. I had decided the ‘type’ of marriage I wanted when most my age were looking for their ‘types’. Now, 10 years into my marriage, it is all that I had wanted. A non-conformist and a-stereotypical association of 2 individuals in love and companionship.

Marriage Stereotype

Marriage Stereotype

Those that know me, know of my distaste in wife-bashing jokes or genderist behaviour. My wife does not mean 25 minutes when she says 5 minutes. My wife does not ‘buy’ dresses when her closet is bursting at the seams. My wife does not hoard on lipsticks like they were going out of fashion tomorrow. My wife does not believe that her money is hers and my salary is hers. My wife chips in equally, or sometimes more, with bill-payments and grocery. My wife does not go shopping with my credit card when she wants to repair her mood or heal an emotional wound. My wife is not like the women shown in TV adverts – cannot appease her with a cold piece of jewellery when emotional blanket is all she needs.

So, you see, I wear my marriage with a lot of pride.

Last week, she wanted to borrow my debit card. I put it in her bag before she left for work. And hours later, while I was at work, my phone went into a tizzy. It logged in a text each time my debit card was being swiped. There were 3 transactions in half an hour. As I sat in my room with my colleague, discussing a creative strategy, I kept checking my mobile, not caring that my ideas were getting into the ICU!

I excused myself, speed-dialled my wife.

“Hello”, she answered.

“So, this is how it feels”

We both burst out laughing!


2 comments on “So This Is How It Feels

  1. IshitaUnblogged
    May 23, 2015

    Many more years of togetherness to Dev and Devi! What can I say? Fabulous! The very reason I hate discussing *boy* and *men* jokes with a group of girlfriends and honestly hate it beyond all means if S cracks jokes and says oh come on you know how guys are! No I really dont understand.

    After a long time read such a wonderful short story.

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