TheCalmDev (Dev J Haldar)

ravings, rantings and ramblings

Relying on You!

I feel that I am getting more and more dependent on you. It wasn’t like this back then. But with the passage of time, I seem to be talking to you more than I ever did. In hind sight, I used to talk a lot with you when I was a child. I used to draw you. I used to draw from you. I used to try to know you deeper. I used to think about you and your reactions. I wanted to be like you. I used to talk to you in my head.

Then, came a time, when I guess I relied more on myself and what I thought was my might. I thought of you but it was just like a mobile alarm reminder; meant to be turned off. Relying on you suddenly became a sign of weakness.

But now, I feel weak if I haven’t thought of you or consulted you or even said it to you in my head. I bank on you. I lean on you. It doesn’t feel any weak now. It feels stronger. I see the changes and the differences; in me and in this world. I still talk to you. I still think about you. I still want you to know what I am going through. I still want you to know what I want and what I don’t. I still confer with you in my head. I still rely on you.

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One comment on “Relying on You!

  1. vibha bhatt
    August 21, 2011

    This is the best blog dev!! Loved it and it really applies to me too.. Each and every thoughtt how much ever weired or stuupid is discussed in detail and then brain storming sessions and once decided its final.. U wrote wht I always thought was just me doing it ..am glad to know I am no different 🙂 thnk u for mking me feel normal 🙂

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This entry was posted on August 19, 2011 by in Old Chronicles.
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